This entry is part 4 of 6 in the series Small Things Done Often


Behaviors, Attitude and Interests


Heart Beliefs

Your 6th grade daughter is convinced she is ugly but you wonder, ‘ in what mirror she is looking.’  Your 5 year old throws fits everytime you go into Target or Walmart. Your six year old is wanting other children to follow what he wants to do and makes a scene if it doesn’t happen. Your 2nd grader gives up quickly when confronted with a problem. Your son freely talks to you but won’t talk with his father. All of these issues and many more are fueled by a heart belief which need a replacement belief for the child to find freedom from the behavior.

Understand that most behaviors in our children come from beliefs rather than out of thin air.  Most parents give little attention to where the behavior comes from because they are so focused on the behavior itself.  It is like trees.  The part of the tree that is above ground doesn’t come out of thin air – it comes from the roots. The part of your child you can’t see are their beliefs and like the roots of a tree they are most responsible for the behaviors you see. Change beliefs and you change behaviors. If you change behaviors only, the belief fueling it will find another way to come out!

In children the most powerful beliefs come from life experiences with little rational evaluation. So when a child is intensely criticized and asked why he is not like a sibling – a belief can be formulated in his heart that he is inferior and not worthy of parent love.

Look how scripture connects heart beliefs and behavior

Romans 10:9-10,“ 9 If you openly declare that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by openly declaring your faith that you are saved.”

James 2:18, “18 Now someone may argue, Some people have faith; others have good deeds. But I say, “How can you show me your faith if you don’t have good deeds? I will show you my faith by my good deeds.”

What are methods for replacing beliefs?  Next blog!

Series Navigation<< “What the heck, where did that come from?”How do we help our kids grow out of bad behavior? >>